The session is booked, you are all set to dig in. There are so many things swirling in your mind though that you don’t even know where to start. And is a coaching session even what will help? Maybe you are afraid to even book a session as you don’t even know what is an appropriate topic.
Picking your topic for a session is hard when there are so many things. My current to-do list is long as I am sure you all can relate to. I know that long-term planning and getting the dog kennel booked and the hotel for an upcoming trip is not a top priority but has so many layers and connections with other people’s plans that it needs to get done. Every time I look into the options for the hotel and the dog kennels, I bring up the names and then shut the laptop without even making a decision or even fully looking at the options, which is a waste of time. If I am not even going to make the choice why look? Something is holding me back, so this became my coachable topic today. Yes, I get coached! My advice is to pick the topic that keeps coming to the top and getting in the way. Even if ‘proper’ prioritizing would say a different topic should be addressed, we will not get far on that ‘important priority ‘ topic if this other topic keeps floating to the top and distracting you.
As for it being a coachable topic, the story we often tell ourselves is that it’s not important enough, I will figure this out on my own. But a good 20-minute coaching session can get this untangled, prioritized action steps focused on. Stops you from wasting time by opening and shutting the laptop, circling back to yet again not making a decision.
Each session is unique. Think of what success at the end of the session would look like. Acknowledging the success measure keeps us focused and accountable.
Sometimes it is what we call a ‘discovery’ session, where success looks like gaining an understanding of the bigger picture what our plans and thoughts are on a topic of concern. Coaching gives us a safe space to lay bare the story we are telling ourselves and what we are doing to prove our confirmation bias is right (aka the crappy stuff holding us back). The coaching session is a safe space to bare our authentic souls and say, “This is how I want it to be”. And then together we can tear down the barriers and get you to where you want to be.
Other sessions may get more action-oriented where the session success measure is more tangible. “I need to tell my co-workers about a work change and want to do it in a way that reflects these concerns.” Success on this looks like gaining understanding on these concerns and how they will be addressed with the work change.”
Knowing the why of the topic, what will be different when you have success on this, digs into the root of the root. It is not about booking the dog kennel or the hotel. It is about reaffirming that this is a trip for fun, rest, and presence with family. From that knowledge, I have the answers of how long, where, and when. As well as what will not honor these priorities (rest is not including a hyper over chewing dog in a hotel!) Twenty minutes later I have gotten clarity on what the root of the trip is about, what honors it, and what the prioritized list of actions is to get there. This coaching session has reenergized me into looking forward to the planning ( which I actually do enjoy), and the trip, and given me the ability to diarize a set time for the planning when I am committed and focused. This means I have the rest of the day to get down to the fun work (earning the money for the trip) that now does not involve getting distracted by kenneling options.
Have a look at your to-do list, what keeps getting circled back to and not moving forward? Book a coaching session and together we will start the fire.
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